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There are many times that a client may feel nervous about sharing something during a session.

This article will explore some of the reasons for this and how a client can overcome their concerns.

First, we want clients to know that nothing they say would be considered oversharing or TMI (too much information). Choosing not to talk about something during a session won’t make it less real. It also prevents the counselor from understanding the full picture.

A client may want to keep information a secret because they are worried about judgement. Clients may also be worried because someone has made them feel shame in the past regarding the topic or the client has been shaming themselves.

A client may also worry that once they are completely open, the therapeutic relationship will change. These are valid reasons to feel nervous about discussing a sensitive topic. However, it’s important to know that a counselor will not judge you or cause you to feel shame. A counselor’s job is to help.  When clients are able to fully trust, the counselor can provide the best support.

A client may also worry that if they overshare, the counselor will want to further explore the topic, even if the client isn’t ready.

A client may also worry that if they disclose sensitive information the counselor will want to refer them to another professional due to the counselors comfort level and whether it is out of their scope of practice.

These are also valid concerns. However, we want clients to know that counselors are continuously educating themselves and seeking supervision for sensitive topics. If there is a topic that a counselor is not competent in, they will tell the client, out of respect. We want our clients to trust their counselor but the counselor also wants to make sure the client is getting the best support. If disclosing the information changes the therapeutic relationship, it is okay! Relationships throughout our life are always evolving, plus it could be a positive change!

Here are some openings for clients to consider using when wanting to address something sensitive with a counselor.

• “I’ve been wanting to talk about (_____) in our sessions, how comfortable are you with that?”
• “Have you ever worked with (_____) in the past? What did that look like?”
• “I want to tell you something but I am not ready to talk about it yet.”
• “I want to talk about something but I’m nervous how you’ll react.”

Lastly, it’s important to stress that clients are the expert in their lives, not their counselor. A counselor is there to provide judgement-free support and explore strategies that will enhance lives. We want to create a space that allows individuals to feel comfortable disclosing all the big and small things during our time together.

Lydia Farley Ms Ed CIT